Rubble Club Meeting 25th July 2008

Hello and welcome! This is Madge Dumpling speaking to you from the headquarters of the Rubble Club, my cosy little parlour here in the Stone Quarry of Undergrowby. It has been a very exciting week for me here, just below the surface of sunny Blackpool. Granny Gray, my shopkeeper has been selling my little rockies to lots of lovely kind new owners and the rubble club membership is bursting at the seams. As you are all invisible to me, I can only hope that you are not all trying to cram yourselves into my parlour at this moment. If you are, speak up for yourselves please, because it would be easy for me to find a larger venue. The Belvedere Hotel on Blackpool Promenade has offered me the run of the place if I should ever need it, (but more of their goings-on later, Rubble Clubbers.) If you remain silent, how can I ever know what you and your little pets want? Up to this week, only two of you have ever spoken out loud, via the comments box displayed somewhere on the screen. Now, this week I am delighted to hear from a lovely young lady called Sally, who was bright and intelligent enough to find the comments button and kind enough to use it to speak to me. Granny Gray remembers her quite clearly. She took quite a shine to her and no wonder. She is a world traveller and great sportswoman, unlike myself. I never go whizzing along fast(I might miss something) and I stick to my home ground, once I have decided where that is. Sally can do the world travelling on behalf of the Rubble Club from now on, and the sports medal-winning as well.
Off you go then, Sally, with your lucky world-travelling pet rock, Polley, and your purple magic wand. I'm waving you off with a grief-stricken tear in my eye, hoping you will return to talk to me again once you have conquered the world, and your pet rock along with you. I have only just heard your voice and now I am losing you to your travels. It would be so exciting for the pet rocks and their owners to hear from you from far away, knowing that one of them is out there having dangerous adventures, flying through the sky and cheering at those terrifying sporting events. Oh, do try to find a laptop wherever you are and report back to us once a week. If we hear nothing we will assume you have heartlessly abandoned us to not knowing what became of you. Nevertheless, Sally and Polley, my heart and the heart of the Rubble Club will be with you forever, wishing you great happiness and glorious success.
I now have to report that I have been invited to open another pet rock shop inside an old phonebox inside the Belvedere Hotel on the North Promenade. I have sent that world-famous artist and shopkeeper, Granny Gray, to paint a nice picture of Undergrowby on the wall and a nice young man and soon-to-be member of the Rubble Club, is then going to put some shelves up to display my pet rocks. Granny Gray foolishly told him about all the other Undergrowby pottery products she sells and now he wants more than just my pet rocks in there. Granny Gray will never learn to keep her big mouth shut. It was I who stumbled up the steps to the Belvedere: it was I who befriended the owners and it was I who was offered the phone-box for my own use and now it is going to be cluttered up with all that other stuff. Well, all I can say is if my pet rocks are not on the best shelf, I shall be having words. I have had a wander round the rooms in there and I must say, it is much posher than the Magic Wand Factory shop on Dickson Road. I have booked the back corner of the wardrobe in the Belvedere's new platinum suite for my birthday party once it opens. I promised to be very quiet, so if some humans have booked it for the same week, I will be no trouble. I am as invisible to the humans as they are to me anyway, so we won't even know each other are there.
The aforementioned world-famous artist and shopkeeper, Granny Gray, painted my portrait on my new range of pet rock laptops, and she did an appalling job of it. She says I am just being vain when I complain that it looks nothing like me and it is so small, you can only just make me out. Contrary to her notions, it will have to be re-done when she can find the time. Meanwhile, the current portrait will have to suffice, and it will probably be an issue so short-lived(if I have my way) it will become a much sought-after collectors' item. I am gratified, but not surprised to be informed by my trusty prefect, Linedancer that her pet rocks are tingling with anticipation at the promise of getting one, so there you are! Linedancer, for all your efforts you are still the world's number one most devoted pet rock owner. There may be many more out there as good as you but how am I to know? They don't write to me. As long as they remain silent, they will never be getting badges and little treats like you.
The Undergrowby members are piling in now, expecting to be waited upon, so I have to leave my laptop and put my apron on. Until next week then, Rubble Clubbers, as ever,I remain your devoted chairman and friend you can rely on, Madge Dumpling.