Rubble Club 22/02/2008

22/02/2008 by Madge

Hello Rubble Clubbers, and welcome to the last meeting in February(your time) and one of the many lonely meetings of wintertime (Undergrowby time, my time). I don’t know how you humans keep going all winter long the way you do. At least I only have to be on top form one day a week (today, Friday) doing my duties here for pet rocks everywhere. The other six days of the week I’ll be dozing away the winter in my little bed cupboard down in the cellar, so don’t trouble yourself to come visiting. Nobody will hear you knocking at the door.

This week, I’ve emptied the table ready for a craft session, Rubblers. We’ll be making Mothers’ Day cards for those little orphan rockies to send to the nearest thing they can find to a mother. Help yourselves to paper and paints, that’s it! You don’t have to be artistic, just a few dots of colour and a few sentimental words, like “Be My Mother” or “I’ve Got No One on Mothers’ Day” or “Am I yours?”or anything else you can think of that would help melt hearts of stone and bring out the mothering instinct in those childless adult rocks. Good luck with that Rubblers. I wish you and those poor orphans well. Now, keep those little cards secret till Mothers’ Day, by which time you will have decided which orphans will have which card glued to their hearts and which adult they will be targetting. If by some strange chance you have no suitable adults, this would be a good time to get some, ready for Mothers’ Day. It would be very sad and depressing for them if those orphans had your lovely home-made cards and no one to give them to! Better to forget celebrating Mothers’Day all together. (But then, you could lend them your own mother for the day, couldn’t you? Tell her to reassure them by dressing up like a pet rock for a while now and again. They’ll be thrilled!)

By next week’s meeting I want you to promise me you will find mothers for them all, because these cards you are making are just too beautiful to waste.

Now, next on the agenda is the competition. I know you will be as surprised as me Rubble Clubbers, when I announce that sadly, nobody at all has entered the pet rock sandcastle competition. The tantalising star prize is still waiting. Does nobody want it?

Right, that’s your Mothers’ Day cards done! Excellent work, Rubblers. Now I’ll serve the tea and rock buns. They’re nice and well done as usual, burned to a crisp, just how we like them. Eeeh, it’s thirsty work being a pet rock collector, isn’t it?

I’m going to leave you now to talk among yourselves while I go and line up all the volunteering-to-be-a foster-mother pet rocks along the mantlepiece for you to consider.

We’ll meet again, Rubble Clubbers, next Friday, same place, not sure what time, it depends when you turn up

Your devoted chairman, Madge Dumpling